Tag: Bean why

bean-about-townn:

okay but now im on a roll so

• don’t imagine james and miranda packing up some of thomas’ things in london and taking them to nassau 
• because james has a plan damn it, and he refuses to even think about the possibility of failure 
• only then they get a letter
• don’t imagine james being unable to set foot in the room he had prepared for thomas and he to share 
• don’t imagine miranda having to pack up her husband’s things alone because james just can’t and she hasn’t seen him in days, anyway
• don’t imagine her taking the boxes down to the cellar – freezing for a moment because ‘thomas died in a cold, dark place’ – and now the only physical evidence they have left of his existence is being locked away somewhere cold and dark too 
• don’t imagine miranda sometimes going down there when james has been gone for weeks, taking out the books, the paintings… 
• don’t imagine one day, james returns home to find the portrait of thomas and miranda in her bedroom. don’t imagine the look on his face. don’t imagine them coming to a silent compromise – it can stay, but never uncovered while he’s home, and he won’t sleep in the same room as it 
• don’t imagine james sometimes gathering his courage and going down to the cellar, only to fall to his knees sobbing before he can even open the boxes. you left him there, he tells himself. you didn’t save him. you don’t deserve to see what’s left