Legolas pretty quickly gets in the habit of venting about his travelling companions in Elvish, so long as Gandalf & Aragorn aren’t in earshot they’ll never know right?
Then about a week into their journey like
Legolas: *in Elvish, for approximately the 20th time* ugh fucking hobbits, so annoying
Frodo: *also in Elvish, deadpan* yeah we’re the worst
Legolas:
~*~earlier~*~
Legolas: ugh fucking hobbits
Merry: Frodo what’d he say
Frodo: I’m not sure he speaks a weird dialect but I think he’s insulting us. I should tell him I can understand Elvish
i mean, honestly it’s amazing the Elves had as many languages and dialects as they did, considering Galadriel (for example) is over seven thousand years old.
english would probably have changed less since Chaucer’s time, if a lot of our cultural leaders from the thirteenth century were still alive and running things.
they’ve had like. seven generations since the sun happened, max.
frodo’s books are old to him, but outside any very old poetry copied down exactly, the dialect represented in them isn’t likely to be older than the Second Age, wherein Aragorn’s foster-father Elrond started out as a very young adult and grew into himself, and Legolas’ father was born.
so like, three to six thousand years old, maybe, which is probably a drop in the bucket of Elvish history judging by all the ethnic differentiation that had time to develop before Ungoliant came along, even if we can’t really tell because there weren’t years to count, before the Trees were destroyed.
plus a lot of Bilbo’s materials were probably directly from Elrond, whose library dates largely from the Third Age, probably, because he didn’t establish Imladris until after the Last Alliance. and Elrond isn’t the type to intentionally help Bilbo learn the wrong dialect and sound sillier than can be helped, even if everyone was humoring him more than a little.
so Frodo might sound hilariously formal for conversational use (though considering how most Elves use Westron he’s probably safe there) and kind of old-fashioned, but he’s not in any danger of being incomprehensible, because elves live on such a ridiculous timescale.
to over-analyse this awesome and hilarious post even more, legolas’ grandfather
was from linguistically stubborn Doriath and their family is actually from a
somewhat different, higher-status ethnic background than their subjects.
so depending on how much of a role Thranduil took in his
upbringing (and Oropher in his), Legolas may have some weird stilted old-fashioned speaking tics in his
Sindarin that reflect a more purely Doriathrin dialect rather than the Doriathrin-influenced Western Sindarin that became the most widely spoken Sindarin long before he was born, or he might have a School Voice
from having been taught how to Speak Proper and then lapse into really
obscure colloquial Avari dialect when he’s being casual. or both!
considering legolas’ moderately complicated political position, i expect he can code-switch.
…it’s
also fairly likely considering the linguistic politics involved that Legolas is reasonably articulate in Sindarin, though
with some level of accent, but knows approximately zero Quenya outside of loanwords into Sindarin, and even those he mostly didn’t learn as a kid.
which would be extra hilarious when he and gimli fetch up in Valinor in his little homemade skiff, if the first elves he meets have never been to Middle Earth and they’re just standing there on the beach reduced to miming about what is the short beard person, and who are you, and why.
this is elvish dialects and tolkien, okay. there’s a lot of canon material! he actually initially developed the history of middle-earth specifically to ground the linguistic development of the various Elvish languages!
Legolas: Alas, verily would I have dispatched thine enemy posthaste, but y’all’d’ve pitched a feckin’ fit.
Aragorn: *eyelid twitching*
Frodo: *frantically scribbling* Hang on which language are you even speaking right now
Pippin, confused: Is he not speaking Elvish?
Frodo, sarcastically: I dunno, are you speaking Hobbit?
Boromir, who has been lowkey pissed-off at the Hobbits’ weird dialect this whole time: That’s what it sounds like to me.
Merry, who actually knows some shit about Hobbit background: We are actually speaking multiple variants of the Shire dialect of Westron, you ignorant fuck.
Sam, a mere working-class country boy: Honestly y’all could be talkin Dwarvish half the time for all I know.
Pippin, entering Gondor and speaking to the castle steward: hey yo my man
Boromir, from beyond the grave: j e s u s
Literally canon
TIL Tumblr can out-language-geek Tolkein and honestly that’s why I love this site so much.
Hey do you dream of running away to sea to become a sailor? BOY HOWDY DO I HAVE AN OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU:
Grays Harbor Historical Seaport has just launched their new training program, Sea School NW. Lemme tell you why this is a huge deal:
The professional maritime world is massively male-dominated, with only 2% of the global industry identifying as female. This program, run by some of the most inclusive, enthusiastic folks in the business, aims to change change that by providing subsidized professional training for underrepresented groups wanting to break into the field.
They’re only accepting scholarship folks right now, which means the only requirements are being age 18-35 and making less than double the federal poverty level for 2017 ($24,280 annually for a single person).
You’ll spend eight weeks sailing aboard the Hawaiian Chieftain, preparing to earn your USCG Ordinary Seaman Credential and advance your trade skills through hands-on-instruction, online coursework, marine system classes, industry mentorship and job skill development.
This is a really awesome thing that Grays Harbor is doing! These skills are incredibly useful. I can’t count how many times I’ve been frustrated by inadequate knotwork or line-handling on my non-sailing research boat. Line handling is something every boat requires, but maritime academies and educational facilities don’t teach how to do it practically.
Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Black Sails Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Captain Flint/Thomas Hamilton, Anne Bonny & “Calico” Jack Rackham & Charles Vane Characters: Captain Flint (Black Sails), Thomas Hamilton, Charles Vane, Anne Bonny, “Calico” Jack Rackham Additional Tags: POV Multiple Series: Part 3 of The Rags of Time Summary:
They had come upon the village at the end of the ninth day. After some debate Hamilton had been sent with Anne and a purse full of gold to secure their dwellings. As such they had two tiny timber cottages and a small plot of overgrown jungle to call their own. Jack was certain that there was more wildlife in the goddamn house than there was outside of it: there’d been a fucking rattlesnake in the bedroom.
what she says: “Oh I don’t mind; we can eat anywhere. I’m not picky.”
what she means: “For my entire life, I’ve been called bossy/picky/selfish/arrogant/bitchy for voicing my own opinions and making my views known, so now when someone I care about asks me about what I want, my immediate gut reaction is to defer to the other person’s preference. it’s less of a hassle to capitulate to someone else’s desires than to risk having someone verbally berate me for being truthful about what I want.”
SCREAM THIS FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOP
This also applies to when you ask “what would you like to talk about” and get this answer or basically any question where you ask an abused person to express an opinion or want of their own. Please be patient while they get braver about actually telling you, and understand when their mind genuinely does go blank upon being asked because it’s new and different and even yes, scary to start realizing that you don’t know how to answer anymore.
[Drawing of a pink axolotl holding a cup of iced coffee and saying “This summer, I’m going to drink iced coffee, learn new things, and make time for my creative passions.” in light pink text in a pink speech bubble.]
Literary Agent: I probably find 90% of my clients through personal referral. Networking is very important.
Me: Look, yet another way social anxiety hurts my life. Thanks, brain chemistry.
Everything is networking!
I am super socially anxious. And when I get nervous, my usual response is hyperactivity, with a side order of lack of focus. I will literally run into a swamp to avoid interacting with people. This makes cocktail parties a kind of hell, and “networking events” a way to go right back to grade school. I wind up standing in a corner, looking puzzled, until I go home and cry in the bathroom. Clearly I am doomed, right?
Nope! Because I wrote/write a lot of fanfic, and interacted with other fanfic authors in a low-pressure, “we are all in this together” way. We became friends because we became friends, not because we were useful to one another. And one of those other authors introduced me to my agent, who she knew through conventions. And the beat goes on.
You can absolutely network in whatever sideways, idiosyncratic manner works best for you. I promise no one is grading.
Sam Vimes fought an ancient mind-controlling spirit and won. Sam Vimes killed a werewolf with his bare hands. Sam Vimes happily wears the awful lumpy itchy socks his wife knits him. Sam Vimes causes traffic jams in order to be home in time to read his baby a bedtime story. Sam Vimes fought at the barricades— twice. Sam Vimes waited until his interviewee had left and then put his coat over his head so no one could hear him laughing hysterically at her silly name. Sam Vimes is my hero.
Sam Vimes overcame a crippling alcohol dependency. Sam Vimes examines and confronts his internal prejudices. Sam Vimes lived in poverty because he was giving his salary to the widows and orphans of fellow officers. Sam Vimes cleaned up a corrupt police force and made it inclusive of the different ethnicities in his city.
Sam Vimes is my hero too.
He turned to leave, then seemed to have a thought. “Sergeant Dorfl!” he said, turning back. “D’you think you’ll believe in gods now?”
Every eye in the Watch House turned to the golem sergeant. “Not Gods, Yet.” said Sergeant Dorfl. “But Always Sam Vimes.”
Sam Vimes created the Boots theory of socioeconomic unfairness, which is still the best and simplest example of poverty creating more poverty I have ever read
Meg's Mumbles 