- remember to stay hydrated. conquering gaul, even vicariously through your de bello gallico text, is thirsty work
- while the characters in the ancient epics can be amazingly vivid and human, their actions come with a strict do not try this at home warning. it is not recommended that you attempt to start fights with local river gods or travel the meditteranean looking to settle a new kingdom for your people just because you saw achilles or aeneas do it
- you may have nightmares about the archaic smile on a fairly regular basis. this is normal. cleanse yourself with some hellenistic sculpture and all will be okay
- becoming a cynic sounds great in theory, but it does not come with a retirement plan. consider your options carefully before committing to an ascetic lifestyle just because diogenes is cool
- ignore the demons you will occasionally summon when you are studying your ancient languages. they will do anything to trick you into selling your soul, and they have some very good lawyers
- and, as always, carthago delenda est